Endless Night

There are voices running around me head,

And demons chasing me around

Someone’s watching, invading my ground.

I must watch everywhere I tread.

The dreams, so vivid, they scare my soul.

The panic, so strong, when I awake.

Reality does not seem to want to take,

So then the pain chases me down this rabbit hole.

The visions so real, my body responds,

It’s like they’re right there, stealing my very being.

I try to tell myself it’s just a passing feeling,

But the agony is there like and endless pond.

The thoughts of their torture seem to never want to leave,

Their faces circle my mind all day long.

Running a track day in and day out,

Hanging around like a sloth in my dying tree.

Anxiety never leaves,

Like an old friend who has over stayed their welcome,

It rises and falls consistently, and leaves seldom.

So fiercely, this unease, to me it cleaves.

Bipolar rears its ugly head once again.

Manic perhaps this time?

Pill after pill to help me decline.

And pray that this mood does not my life upend.

Or perhaps this time the mood is mixed.

A dangerous combination of up and down.

The mixed state is a hard one to find yourself bound,

And unfortunately the hospital might be the only fix.

Sometimes the state of mind is depressed.

The pain of this disposition can be beyond words.

Like a thousand men stabbing you with their saddened swords.

Leaving you swallowed up in your world of distress.

Overwhelming emotions attempt to consume me whole.

They wash over me taking away my very breath.

Sometimes they are so bad they leave me longing for death.

But I fight hard with every inch of my being for control.

But even with all these battles I must fight,

Even when it feels like the pain will never end,

Even when it’s like into a bottomless pit I will descend,
I will never stop the war on this endless night.