God Whooped My Butt While I Was Driving

I was driving home from church tonight and I was having myself a big old pity party with God. You know what I’m talking about. “Poor me…everything is so hard for me…why does it have to be this way…why can’t I be this way,” etc. I am going to be transparent here and tell you that my particular complaint was that I spend a lot of time sowing into other people’s lives but it feels like I am in a season where no one sows into me and I was feeling sorry for myself. I asked God if I could get a little encouragement from someone other than my mom for once. And I heard God say to me “Am I not enough?” Well that shut me up! I stammered my apologies feeling like a moron. Here I am complaining about how no one loves me or cares about me and the Most High King is asking me why He isn’t enough!

How many of us have been there? I am being honest here that I take it for granted that God is always there for me. Sometimes I forget that He’s right by my side every moment of everyday and He longs for my attention. And there I was with my head up my rear-end complaining about my life and the lack of attention that I felt I was getting.

My lesson here was that God is always there and He wants nothing more than to love on me but if I don’t give Him the chance He can’t do it. Sometimes I need to turn off the music and just listen to what He has to say.

Well God wasn’t done with me there. After I apologized I got a little smart with God and said “Well how in the world am I supposed to respond to that! Of course you are enough…I just…I want…” Again I was at a loss. The truth of the matter is I was still saying He wasn’t enough.

I got quiet for a little while and I heard God say that He understands me completely. He told me that He knows what it is like to want someone’s attention and not get it, that He understands the desire for people to talk to me and lift me up. And again, I felt like a moron. I am complaining about my little life and here God is being ignored by half the freaking world! God loves us all and I found myself asking again for forgiveness because I am guilty of neglecting Him.

But God still wasn’t done. He said “Did I not give Israel a king because they asked? Because you ask, I will give to you.” Again I got smart with God and said, “Well my goodness I hope this request turns out better than Israel’s did.” I heard God laugh and I joined in.

But again God surprised me. First He reminded me of how selfish I was being. That it is not about me. But then He turned around and told me that He will give to me what I have asked for! Isn’t God amazing! I am sure He was very frustrated with my attitude (and rightly so I might add) but He ended up saying that because I asked, I will receive.

So by this point I am sure that you all think I am completely insane, talking to God on  my drive home like this but I really learned some things: God wants my attention and He will bless me when I ask…even if He doesn’t quite agree with my desire in the first place.

So I wanted to tell you that God wants your attention. As crazy as it may seem to you that I sat and literally talked out loud to God in my car and then got quiet and heard Him talk back, the truth is He wants to do the same with you. He’s right here…right by your side, right now, as you read this. He wants you to talk to Him, He really does. You are the apple of His eye and He longs for your attention. So do it. Say something. Even if it’s just saying hey to Him, I am sure that He would love it if you said hello every once in a while. And the even better thing to do is to listen. You can’t hear Him in the noise. You need to turn off the music and Facebook and listen. And it’s most likely not going to be a deep booming voice coming out of nowhere (if it was I would need a change of underwear). No, it doesn’t work like that. Listen inside of yourself, deep inside. What do you feel your heart is saying? What does that deep place in your stomach feel like? That is where God speaks, all you have to do is listen.

The last thing I want to tell you is to ask. Ask for the stupid things that don’t matter. I am not saying God is going to give you a million dollars…no, it doesn’t work like that. Ask for what your heart wants. If your single and want a spouse ask for one and then listen to what God has to say on the matter. If you want a better marriage, ask and then listen to what He has to say. If you want new friends, ask! If you want to make a good grade on that test, ask!

Just talk to Him, ask Him what’s on your heart, and tell Him what’s on your mind. He wants to hear you, even about the stupid stuff, even about the things that you don’t want to tell your best friend because it sounds so ridiculous. For the love of all things in heaven just talk!

Love, Randi